ticcyyy: (Default)
ticcyyy ([personal profile] ticcyyy) wrote2009-01-26 11:26 pm
Entry tags:

Boundaries (Hugh/Lisa RPF; PG-13)

Sooooo... I'm officially going to hell. Or I would be, if I believed in such a place.

title: Ticcy Has Lost Her Mind Boundaries
pairing: Hugh/Lisa RPF
rating: PG-13
disclaimer: I certainly have no clue who Hugh Laurie and Lisa Edelstein are beyond their public image. Nothing to be taken seriously here, folks. No disrespect is intended towards Hugh, Lisa or anybody else.
notes: This was originally meant to be for the porn battle but I felt much too uncomfortable writing RPF smut... but ended up with a completely self-indulgent fic, regardless. And this really is mindless self-indulgence. Set post-SAG awards, naturally. Obviously, if RPF bothers you, don't read.

P.S.: I place partial blame on [livejournal.com profile] austen, [livejournal.com profile] katernater, [livejournal.com profile] another_myself, [livejournal.com profile] chippers87 and [livejournal.com profile] hihoplastic, all of whom were no help whatsoever in discouraging me and my first foray into RPF. Ilu guys. ♥

summary: Fame is a lonely occupation.

by Ticcy

It's been a long day.

Award ceremonies always are, often starting as early as eight in the morning for hair appointments, make up, last minute dress fitting for any wardrobe adjustments, scheduled interviews, the red carpet... Not to mention the award ceremony itself and the after party. Lisa loves to party but after a full several hours of being crammed into high heels, posing for photos and keeping a smile plastered on her face through interview after interview of being asked the same questions over and over, she's more than a little exhausted by the end of the night. She's not exactly young anymore, either, even if she still feels it most days.

And poor Hugh, she thinks to herself fondly as she watches him close the door behind him. Ever the self-depreciating introvert, being forced to socialise at every turn. She studies his lined, weary face while he tugs his bow tie loose, a feeling of affection for him spreading warmly in her chest. She hadn't really asked if he wanted to come back to her hotel room; he'd more or less tagged along after asking what she was doing for the rest of the evening. He has his own hotel room to go back to, of course. She suspects he's opting for her company for the mere fact that they're familiar with each other and Hugh's a lot lonelier out here in the States than he lets on. She appreciates he likes spending time with her, even despite the times she knows she gets on his nerves. Fame is a lonely occupation: everybody wanting a piece of the rich and famous without giving a single thing back in return.

She kicks her shoes off with a sigh and plops down on the end of her bed. Her body aches in all the places it always does when she's strapped into an expensive, uncomfortable gown for too long. Her legs are particularly achy. She leans over to give her tired feet a rub. "So glad to be out of those shoes."

"Better you than me," Hugh agrees.

"You really think so? I think you'd look darling in a pair of these." She scoops up her shoes by the straps and holds them up, dangling them from her fingers.

"Hmm," he replies in a disapproving tone that makes Lisa laugh.

She drops her shoes back to the floor and leans back on her hands with a sigh, watching Hugh idly walk further into the room while unbuttoning his collar. "You talked to Jo yet?"

He nods, tucking his bow tie into his pocket. "Quick phone call after the ceremony."

Lisa waits for Hugh to say more and she frowns slightly when he offers nothing else. She understands the pressure a busy acting career can put on a relationship, but she's never been in the position Hugh is in. Away from home for years on end, family in another country. Not to mention being thrown into the limelight the way he has and having to cope with a work schedule more gruelling that she could possibly fathom. "How's she doing?" Lisa asks conversationally.

"She's good. A bit disappointed she couldn't make it, even though she hates publicity. Very pleased that I won."

"We're all pleased that you won, Hugh."

"Yeah, well." He shrugs dismissively and pushes his hands into his pockets.

Not for the first time in all the years she's known Hugh, Lisa has to bite her tongue against telling him all the reasons why he should be pleased he won, why he deserved to win. She knows he won't listen to her. He never listens to anybody when it comes to that kind of thing. "Why are you so self-depreciating?" she wonders aloud.

Hugh frowns. "Is that a trick question?"

She gives him a look, then pushes herself to her feet. The plush hotel carpet feels heavenly underneath them, after being trapped in high heel for so many hours. "No. I'm just curious."

He shrugs again. "Afraid I have no answer, in that case."

She takes the few steps from the bed across to him, fighting back an urge to hug him. Hugh's never been an overly affectionate man and he's never welcomed affection easily, but Lisa has always been the affectionate kind and often finds it hard to restrain herself from offering it to those who mean a lot to her. She manages to hold herself back from him, though extends her hand towards him. He extracts a hand from his pocket and Lisa snags his pinkie loosely with hers. "You're so frustrating," she tells him. "Don't you get frustrated with being so self-depreciating?"

"All the time," Hugh replies. "Terribly frustrated. But I wouldn't be me if I wasn't perpetually frustrated."

Lisa lets out a throaty laugh. "That's true. I can't argue with that."

She gives him an affectionate smile, her heart warming again at the affectionate half-smile he returns and she steps closer into his personal space. She's greeted with the smell of his cologne and cigarettes, a scent so familiar to her after all the years of working with him. She smiles again when she feels his pinkie squeezing hers, then arches up onto her toes to place a light kiss to his cheek. Lowering back to the flats of her feet, her eyes meet Hugh's and after a moment of staring at him she slowly rises onto her toes again and presses another kiss to his cheek, a little closer to his mouth. Then another, even closer, noting his eyes close when she's right at the corner of his lips. Hugh turns his face towards her ever so slightly and Lisa dares to let her mouth ghost over his. With his eyes closed, she can't tell what's going through Hugh's mind but she wonders if he can hear her heart racing a loud six-eight rhythm in her chest. She touches her mouth to his and closes her eyes as he responds, just a light and lingering kiss.

Letting his pinkie go, Lisa stretches her arms up and tentatively wraps them around his neck, feeling his hands rest politely on her hips. Just like Hugh himself, the kiss is polite and careful and she opens her eyes when he seems to hesitate and then pull back.

"We really shouldn't," he says quietly.

"I know," she replies, her voice just as quiet.

She can't help smiling a little guiltily at the equally guilty smile Hugh gives her. She leans back up and presses a gentle kiss to his lips, watching his eyes slide shut again, and soon finds herself getting caught up in a kiss that leaves her with a beard burn over her chin and her breathing a little quicker. The kiss breaks for only a second, Hugh diving back down to her for another kiss, his hands now not as politely cupped over her ass and his tongue tasting hers. Lisa pushes her hands into his hair and grips onto the back of his head, hunching up into the kiss. She takes a few steps back with him urging her backwards, his hands now travelling up over her bare arms. He touches her with an uncertainty that seems to mirror his own self-esteem and not just his uncertainty of the situation; it's almost as though he's afraid of touching her in places he's not allowed.

"It's okay," Lisa says when he pulls back with a shake of his head, not just to reassure him but herself. This is her colleague, after all, and crossing a boundary like this with a colleague is never a good idea. In attempt to lighten the intense moment, she lets out a soft, self-conscious laugh. "It's okay, Hugh," she says again.

"No, it's not," he replies. He drops his hands away, before lifting one back to his face to rub his lips, maybe trying to rub away the evidence of the kiss. Lisa's not sure what he finds funny, but he let out an ironic snort and scratches his head. He appears flustered, unsure, awkward. His face is coloured and the vein on his forehead stands out as though he's suddenly stressed. "I'm sorry."

"What for?"

"For..." He gestures between them, then waves his hand about. "I, uh. Just. You know." He waves his hand between them again.

Lisa tsks in exasperation and reaches for his hand, clasping it in both of hers. "Hugh, it's okay. I'm sorry. I am." She clutches his hand to her chest, wishing she could get across to him that he need not beat himself up over every little thing he does. She's suddenly lost for what to say, though. The only thing she can think of that's safe enough to broach is tonight's SAG awards. "Focus on tonight. You won. How exciting is that?"


"You deserved it."


"No 'buts'." She stubbornly squeezes his hand and tries to encourage him with a beaming smile. Focusing on the guilt of what the kiss they just shared wasn't going to do either of them any good. It was after all, Lisa tells herself, just a kiss. Hugh, on the other hand, could never seem to function without beating himself up over something. Sometimes, she wants nothing more than to slap him for being so self-conscious and self-defeating. Other times, she wants nothing more than to shower him with praise, though she always holds back because she knows how uncomfortable that makes him. There'd been times she'd done just that and it had resulted in little more than Hugh making a remark that was delivered with just the right amount of sharpness to stun her into silence and make her feel two inches tall.

"Come here," she says lightly after an awkward pause, pulling Hugh to him. She doesn't want him to hurry off in a fluster and she doesn't want what just happened between them to linger like a white elephant. Hoping that he'd accept her attempt at clearing the tension, she wraps her arms around his waist. To her relief, he lifts his arms around her shoulders. She settles her cheek to his chest and for a long few moments, she just stands in his enveloping embrace. This is what she should have done originally, just hugged him. They would have probably avoided that unexpected moment altogether if she had.

"It's been a long day," she says after another pause, just for conversation's sake.

"It has." A beat, and through the silence Lisa can almost hear the cogs in Hugh's head turning, trying to process the kiss they'd just shared. "I should probably head off."

Inwardly, Lisa sighs and she closes her eyes. Sometimes her own spontaneity was her own undoing, coming on too strong when she doesn't mean to or giving into an impulse that she hasn't thought through properly. She really hopes this doesn't come between Hugh and herself. The relationship they have is too special and important to let a momentary lapse of reason to ruin it. Not to mention they still had to work together.

"Okay," she finally answers, reluctant to let him go. Not just because she feels guilty for what just happened but because it feels inexplicably comforting to be held by someone who matters to her. Fame really is a lonely occupation, right down to the basic things that come so simply to others like intimacy. Loosening her grip on him, she pulls back with her head lowered, too uncertain to meet his eyes until she feels the unexpected brush of stubble against her forehead, along with the gentle kiss of his lips. Lisa turns her head up to look at him and a flood of relief moves through her as he takes her hand in his long enough to give it a firm squeeze.

"See you tomorrow," Hugh says. He hesitates. "Again, I'm sorry."

"Don't be," Lisa replies quickly. "Please. Don't be."

He squeezes her hand again with an unconvincing smile. "Sleep well."

"I'll try."

Hugh steps back and turns away. Lisa crosses her arms over her middle and watches him venture towards the door, offering a final rueful smile to him before he slips out of the room.


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